The British Government has decided that the best way of dealing with potential Islamic extremists is to catch terrorists when they are young. Very young. The Conservatives have unveiled a scheme in which kindergartens and schools must be on high alert for any babies, toddlers and children who might not exhibit ‘British values’. Early years providers and schools that do not obey the rules are at risk of funding cuts and other disciplinary action. But what exactly are British values? As a UK citizen, I’d offer the following suggestions:
We drink far too much and don’t stop until we’ve thrown up or blacked out. We like to fight a lot, especially after footie matches. We are terrified of making eye contact on the tube, and we go to hot countries where nobody speaks our language and shout at them loudly in English until they understand us. We enjoy complaining about pretty much everything, but never do anything to change things. The weather is our favorite subject; we moan when it’s cold and we moan even more on the rare occasions we have a hot day. We have infamous crap cuisine, but we love all the food our multicultural society can offer. We don’t see any injustice at all in the fact that we have no constitution, are subjects (not citizens) of an un-elected Queen, and we have a ridiculously corrupt electoral system that allowed David Cameron to be voted into power with just 32% of the overall vote. Immigrants should totally embrace all of this, right?
The government say they want to focus on cultivation of the following:
- democracy
- the rule of law
- individual liberty
- mutual respect
- tolerance for those with different faiths and beliefs
One mother from Brighton, England, was appalled when her son’s kindergarten sent out an email to advise parents they would be taking part in the government’s controversial scheme. Alison Phipps, who is white and non-Muslim, responded with classic British humor. Her sarcastic reply made reference to Prime Minister David Cameron’s alleged sex act with a dead pig (more on that here) and she suggested that babies need to learn how to drink tea and also stop crying so much, in order to perfect that typically British ‘stiff upper lip’.
In recent months, other surveys have recently been handed out to pupils in East London, an area with a high Muslim population. They ask children’s responses on concepts such as religion, gender equality, authority and submission, respect for people who are different, and views on God. Many people accuse the Government of Islamophobia, and point out that the questions are very arbitrary and prove nothing.
Here’s Alison’s response to her son’s kindergarten in full. Let us know what you think in the comments section.
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